plans.

zoe will walk up to me and lift my shirt to talk to my belly and kiss her brother and sing made up songs to him. every time it happens i almost have to pinch myself. i never could understand the timing, often wondering why it took so long for us to have another baby, but now i do. now it all makes perfect sense.



i said then, that when i met the next child we had, i would probably understand it all when i got to hold them and know them and love them. but it's happened even sooner than i expected. we already love him. he already has a few names, and we all stare in amazement while we watch his tiny body parts move across my growing belly. we smile really big and teary-eyed when we hear his heartbeat and we imagine what he looks like in there when we feel his little hiccups. we wonder if he'll look like zoe did as a baby. we wonder if he'll be wild because he never stops moving. we also wonder why i HAVE to eat 7 oreo's and chug a glass of milk every night after dinner. but mostly, we anticipate his arrival and talk about him and love him like he's already a part of our family. and he is.

i always imagined having kids about two years apart. i figured that'd be a perfect age gap. they could be friends and play together. they could have that super close sibling bond that i'd seen between so many of my friends and extended family. when it didn't happen like that i was admittedly a little bit sad about it. but the way that she understands what's happening and how our family will change in the spring, the love that she has for someone she's never even met, and the eager energy she has to be involved in everything about him makes my heart swell in a different way.



[zoe's outfit was epic this particular day. tie dye, leopard print, plaid, polka dots, stripes, and patent leather. girl knows how to brighten winter days, i tell you.]

another reminder that these things in life you can't control - that there is a reason bigger than you and your plans. and i have no doubt that the bond that they share will be more special than i could ever imagine. i can't wait to see.



[all photos by jesse. he rules.]

[27 weeks and some days here. every website says the third trimester starts on a different week, but when i divide the total pregnancy by three, i'm in the third part. so i have officially declared -- i'm in the home stretch!]